Monday, August 20, 2007

Help Others Succeed And You Will

Do you enjoy getting emails that start like this?

...Hey Charlie,

Just wanted to let you know that your help was very much appreciated. We were contacted by Bill Example, President of Exciting Company. Julie had a meeting with him...

I know I do.

I took this particular quote from an email I received a few weeks ago. I obviously changed some names, but otherwise, that's exactly how the email started. This email told me that I had helped the future wife of someone I know get a position because I was willing to contact my contacts on her behalf.

In fact, someone I know connected with someone I DON'T know in order to help her. I've never met Bill Example. That's pretty amazing to me.

Here's an amazing truth:

You succeed by helping other people succeed.

I believe I heard some form of that from Zig Ziglar, the famous motivational speaker, before I heard it from anyone else.

How likely is it that my friend will help me when the time comes to ask him for help?

My experience tells me that he'll be 100% on my side and willing to introduce me to anyone he knows.

Whether or not you've tried networking before, I have an excellent method that I learned from someone I know who lives in a VERY nice house in La Jolla, California. The community of La Jolla is a pretty expensive place to live, even by San Diego standards, so she must be doing something right. She learned this method from one of the most successful people she knows. I have combined her method with the method I learned from Anthony Dorhmann, who raised about 10 MILLION DOLLARS to privately fund his company, Lasershield, as well as the online methods I have found helpful. If you search Google for Lasershield Systems, you can find Lasershield and see that Lasershield is a going concern.

First, get connected on I personally have direct relationships with over 1000 people on LinkedIn, so connecting with me connects you to my direct relationships and their direct relationships. Those 1000 or so people are connected to almost 370,000 people who are connected to over 4.7 MILLION people.

Second, make a list of people you know without censoring the list. AFTER you have made the complete list, check it for those most likely to network with you. Don't cross people off the list. Their names can remind you of other people you know or used to know, even if they are not currently people you consider likely to be interested in networking.

Third, invite people you know to connect with you on LinkedIn and a SEARCHABLE network that YOU CAN SEE will start to build. Honestly, it doesn't hurt to connect with someone like me because you automatically have a much larger network than starting one by yourself.

Fourth, find out what people you know need and decide what you need as well. The more specific you can be, the more possible it is for someone to get a mental picture of someone they know who can help. Make a list of half a dozen to maybe a dozen requests (needs). Keep in mind that your list might look a lot different than someone else's. Here's an example:

Networking Needs - Who Do I NEED to meet?

1. People who are open to creating extra streams of income
2. People who are interested in personal development/self development
3. People who have need of professional speakers
4. People who are willing to network in this fashion and give networking priority
5. People who are interested in investing in scholarships or grants for students to publicize their business.
6. People who would like to learn how to build their small business online.
7. People who need coaching.

You ask someone you know for help with the needs on your list and they ask you for help with their list. Some of the requests you are making are on behalf of people you know. (Remember the Thank You message that started this article?) Some people will not have a name for you right now. On average, if you have half a dozen different requests and you are prepared to get more specific in order to help your networking partner help you, you can expect at least one connection every other time you do a list with someone. I have even heard of someone finding a landscaper this way, a Chief Financial Officer, a great restaurant, a place to live, even a spouse! And don't forget the Lasershield guy! You can watch my future progress and find out more at:

Feel free to check out these related blogs which help the process:

You can also find my profile on I'm Dr. Network.

Saturday, July 21, 2007

Before planning

During my years as a Toastmaster I have told the story of an imaginary dark age. By dark age I mean a time similar to the European Dark Ages when people lived without the benefit of the knowledge that kept the Roman Empire running.

Imagine yourself in this "nearly knowledgeless" dark age as an observer. You see someone building what you believe to be a wall out of stones and some primitive type of mortar. After a little while the laborer runs out of stones, so he starts walking and you follow. (Don't worry, he can't see or hear or smell or touch you. These are some benefits of the dark age being imaginary!) He walks through a meadow, over a hill and through another meadow and at the edge of the meadow you see what seems to be a natural formation of rocks and there are lots (maybe even oodles!) of smaller stones of varying sizes. He bends over and picks up several stones and when he fills his arms he starts back to his building site. He doesn't know how fortunate he is not to need any permits. In fact, he has never heard of a permit. Unfortunately, because this a is a nearly knowledgeless dark age, he has also never heard of a wheelbarrow. With just his body available to carry stones, he gathers nine or 10 stones and drops one or two nearly every trip. Each round trip is a mile and a quarter or ten furlongs and takes him 35 minutes to complete. After 8 trips for a total of four hours and 40 minutes, he has 64 stones and is ready to start on the wall again.

Does he believe hard work is its own reward? Maybe. More likely, he just does what he knows how to do because he doesn't know anything else and he believes he must do it to survive. He gathers an average of 64 stones slightly more than twice per day. One day a week he gives himself a break by only gathering rocks. He ONLY works four hours and 40 minutes during his day of "rest". In a week he will gather an average of 960 stones and that will take him 70 hours. That doesn't include the time it takes to form the wall out of stones and mortar. Lucky for him he barters for the mortar, which saves him time. That time is precious, because he works 16 hours a day six days a week and four hours and 40 minutes one day a week. He works 100 hours and 40 minutes per week. Just under 30 hours is spent forming the wall. The other hour or so is time spent bartering.

Good thing he likes berries, because there are bushes just about everywhere. Sometimes he gets tired of berries, though. About three times a month he kills an animal on his day of "rest". Once in a while he'll get an animal on a work day, but that means less sleep or less work, so that doesn't happen very often. He's also fortunate that he's skilled at hunting, because half the time the animal is a big one and he can't eat it all, so he can barter what he doesn't consume.


How do you think he feels working all those hours to gather and carry stones? Are there any similarities to your life/work? Please explain.

If you were carrying stones, would you get frustrated when you dropped stones or do you think you would just take it in stride as part of the process? Please explain.

Do you think he works as much and as hard as he does because he doesn't know any other way? How is that similar or dissimilar to the way you do things? Please explain.

Do you think he notices natural beauty and abundance in his surroundings? Do you? Please explain.

Do you give yourself time to rest/relax/recharge? More or less than our imaginary dark age inhabitant? Why?

Do you think he would exchange something of value with someone else if he knew that person could put together stones and mortar as fast and as well as he can? Is there any work in your life that you would be willing to have someone else do? Would you be willing to exchange value with them for the value they provide?

Do you think he would be happy to learn about wheelbarrow technology? Yes or no. Why?

If someone taught him wheelbarrow technology, would he just "know" it or would he use it?

Would you just "know" it in your head or would you use the knowledge of technology you had learned? Is that how you do things now? Please explain.

Dig Your Well Before You're Thirsty.

Sounds like excellent advice to me for every arena of life.

It's also the title of a book by Harvey McKay. In this particular instance, Harvey McKay is talking about networking and I am a HUGE advocate of networking. The complete title is:

Dig Your Well Before You're Thirsty: The Only Networking Book You'll Ever Need

Click on the title of today's post to see McKay's book on Amazon.